"Where are you going, where have you been?" by Joyce Carol Oates tells the story of a young girl's journey in search of her own identity. Along the way she uses her beauty and sexuality to create, in her mind, a feeling of maturity that ultimately becomes her undoing. She believes that by spending her summer days at the mall, dressing differently than she would at home, and flirting with older boys, finding pleasure in ignoring the boys she knows, she is being herself and being herself. creating his own identity, different from that of his mother or sister. It is only at the end of the story, when Arnold Friend enters his house, that he begins to realize what is truly important. The title of the story comes into play at the end when she leaves with Arnold. He doesn't recognize the city outside; he doesn't know where he's going. He realizes that all the time he spent worrying about appearances was pointless; she couldn't say where she had been, because her journey had just begun. At the beginning of the story we meet Connie, a fifteen-year-old girl who lives with her parents and older sister. We quickly see that Connie has a habit of checking herself in the mirror and looking at other people to see if they notice her and her good looks. “He had a habit of giggling quickly and nervously craning his neck to look at himself in the mirror or checking other people's faces to make sure his was okay.” (Oates) From this sentence we can see that Connie spends a lot of time thinking about her appearance. It soon becomes apparent that he does this with the appearances of others as well, first shown when his mother is described. "His mother [...] didn't have much reason... middle of paper... him to the other boy, taking his time." (Oates) The way he tries to make his words seem disinterested and looks past him to the other boy in the car shows his attempt to control the two boys with his disinterest. He uses his appearance to control the boys, and here we see that he is unable to control these two because they are both wearing sunglasses. "The driver's glasses were metallic and reflected everything in miniature." (Oates) Through the sunglasses everything is distorted and Connie has no control. The driver introduces himself; “I want to introduce myself, I'm Arnold Friend and that's my real name and I'll be your friend, darling” (Oates) During the conversation Arnold tries to convince Connie to take a ride with him in his car, but she shrugs off all his advances. Works Cited Oates, Joyce Carol “Where are you going, where have you been?"